03 July 2017
Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Loves of Hercules
02 July 2017
Berlin post
01 July 2017
Doctor Who: The Doctor Falls
More of an emotional episode than an action one, this very much gives some good closure to many of the characters, while leaving the door open for returns. The Cybermen are again great here and there's some nice tying together of all the different origin stories, so to speak. Capaldi's Doctor is a bit moany through much of this, but as a way to 'die' – although he hasn't quite gone yet – it's a superb one. Two Masters were pretty good fun, but not as much as it could have been.
Another great ending though; Christmas will be very interesting indeed.
8/10
29 June 2017
Doctor Who: World Enough and Time
This review is later than usual as I've been away in Vienna, Austria and was unable to watch the episode until today. I made sure that I avoided spoilers though.
As we heard towards the end of Steven Moffat's time as show runner, this episode frankly knocks it out of the park. As well as great acting all round – it took me a few minutes to spot one key twist – he's added a whole new level of horror to one of the show's most iconic 'monsters'; going to levels that were only hinted at when RTD handled them.
A brilliant episode from start to finish and next week's finale is something not to be missed.
10/10
19 June 2017
Finsbury Park
17 June 2017
Doctor Who: The Eaters of Light
Rona Munro, who wrote the final story of the original run back in 1989 has been away from this show for far too long – her return is a triumph with a great story, a brilliantly realised creature and lots of great gags.
This is also the first story of the 12th Doctor's era to be set in Peter Capaldi's native Scotland and it works really well.
9/10
16 June 2017
Grenfell Tower
10 June 2017
2017 General Election results
A fuller post on this will follow, pending post-poll studies of the actual demographics that turned out. However, some quick thoughts:
- The Conservatives remain in power to all intents and purposes. May got the highest vote share for them since Margaret Thatcher, despite leading a highly inept campaign. It is clear, however, she is not suited to the role of PM and should probably step aside for someone more competent at the top job.
- Labour did much better than expected, but whether this was down to Corbyn or despite him remains to be studied. He has taken Labour a good deal of the way there, but he may not be the person to take them back into power.
- The Lib Dems are irrelevant now. Nick Clegg's decision to go for full coalition instead of confidence and supply has cost his party dear; he has now paid with his own seat.
- The SNP are badly battered but still there – the next Scottish Parliament elections will be very interesting.
- The DUP... well, we're all going to be paying a lot more attention to Northern Ireland now, that's for sure.
Doctor Who: Empress of Mars
Got to say that I didn't enjoy that one at all. Looked great, but the guest characters were all very broad stereotypes, the plot twists were silly (dropping one big one without warning suggested something important got lost in the edit) and the new Ice Warriors weapon seems like an excuse for the effects people to show off..
Also, that was one of the most out of left field reappearances by a character I've ever seen. I didn't even know that voice actor was still alive...
3/10
09 June 2017
General Election Result 3: Or maybe not...
08 June 2017
General Election Result 2: I think the exit poll is off
UK General Election 2017 Results 1: Exit Poll
04 June 2017
London Bridge/Borough terrorist attack
03 June 2017
Doctor Who: The Lie of the Land
A strong episode, with Capaldi at his cold best... also, a very different episode for Missy... There were certain elements I wasn't overly keen on though, with the resolution being a bit too 'Power of Love' for my taste.
Great central idea, could have been executed (no pun intended) a bit better.
8/10
01 June 2017
General Election prediction
31 May 2017
US 2016/17 upfronts thoughts
- CBS did their usual bulk early renewal.
- Designated Survivor, a superb show, was a natural candidate (no pun intended) for renewal. Agents of SHIELD less so, but it must have its fans in the upper management.
- Timeless getting axed was sad, but no surprise as it had middling ratings. Getting reprieved three days later was a huge surprise. The show will almost certainly be a summer one and hopefully it will get two or three more runs - it's a fun show, even if a bit silly at times. Hey, so is Doctor Who.
- The CW's DC based shows continue to do well - Legends of Tomorrow is great and the episodes of the other shows that I've watched relating to crossovers are fun as well.
Cancellations
- Conviction failed and failed big time. Hayley Atwell will probably be moving back to the UK soon; you don't really get a third chance to crack the US. I think the 10pm slot on Mondays for ABC may become a "cursed one", but we shall see.
- Powerless didn't even get to conclude its run before being yanked, which is a huge failure for a DC based show.
New shows
- A major drop in the number of new shows this year; the pilots may have been really bad...
- Star Trek: Discovery looks visually epic and I definitely plan to watch it, but the proof of the pudding remains in the eating.
- The Orville, Seth MacFarlane's spoof space drama looks like it could be a lot of silly fun and I definitely plan to do that.
- Think I'll pass on The Gifted. Amy Acker is a brilliant actor, but she alone does not a series make and I prefer my comic book shows with some good jokes.
- Also Valor looks too 'angsty' for my taste.
- NBC have again geo-blocked their trailers... Sarah Shahi has got her own show with Dennis Haysbert, but it remains to be clear whether it will be a Shaw-fire hit or if it will be time to Palmer off in May... with that awful pun, I'm done.
27 May 2017
Doctor Who: The Pyramid at the End of the World
An episode with an epic scope and yet still relatively small-scale, this features one of the best plots we've seen in a good while with a great cliff-hanger. The special effects are also great and it's really good to see an actor with dwarfism playing a human instead of an alien.
Next week looks really interesting, even if a bit of a remake of "The Last of the Time Lords", which was nearly a decade ago now!
8/10
26 May 2017
Remember a little thing called margin of error
23 May 2017
Sir Roger Moore 1927-2017
Manchester
21 May 2017
Doctor Who: Extremis
Explaining just what the Doctor has in that vault, this is a very dark episode, literally and metaphorically. The pay-off when it arrives makes the journey worthwhile, but if we're being honest, it's a bit of a slog at times.
There's some good humour (although it's rather limited) and the performances are again stellar, but there have been much better Steven Moffat episodes over the years.
What this does do is set up the next episode and kick things up a gear... what happens next will be very interesting.
7/10
18 May 2017
Chris Connell 1964-2017
17 May 2017
All The President's Men 2: Electric Trumpaloo
14 May 2017
Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Land That Time Forgot
This 1974 fantasy movie based on the 1924 novel is not a bad film, but it is definitely cheesy and the imperialist overtones of the original work are pretty clear to see. The most memorable character for me is Dietz, played with relish by Anthony Ainley, who later played the Master in Doctor Who against Doctors Four through Seven.
I have to say that while this episode (which I watched in two parts separated by over a week) was enjoyable, it doesn't stick in the memory like some of the others have. Not bad at all, but certainly not a classic.
7/10
13 May 2017
Doctor Who: Oxygen
A strong episode throughout with a strong horror quotient and some very dark humour – especially Velma, the AI voice of the suits. What is basically a lot of corridor action is done very well, although it does get a bit preachy at times.
Great ending though... There's a spoilery joke that I won't make.
9/10
08 May 2017
A limited nuclear attack on the UK - how much damage could it do?
| Some of the detonations |
For ease of calculation, I will be limiting this to Topol/SS-25 ICBMs at 800kt each, going off 1000 metres above their targets - this does more damage, but produces less fallout. This will just cover the initial attack - not fallout, which is very much weather dependent.
The targets are:
Aldermaston (nuclear bomb construction)
RAF Boulmer (Air Defence control)
RAF Brize Norton
RAF Coningsby
Faslane (Naval base)
RAF Fylingdales (Early warning radar)
RAF Lakenheath (USAF)
London (10 Downing Street to be precise)
RAF Lossiemouth
RAF Marham
RAF Menwith Hill (US/UK intelligence and communications facility)
Plymouth (Naval base)
Porton Down (Chemical Weapons)
Portsmouth (Naval base)
RAF Waddington
That is 15 ICBMs... Unfortunately, the system keeps resetting itself, but I end up with well over a million dead, mostly those in London, Plymouth and Portsmouth, but other areas will produce thousands of dead. I did not cover army bases, but it is entirely possible that the Russians could eliminate the UK militarily with 30 or so ICBMs.
However, the UK would still have a missile boat out in the North Atlantic with 8 Trident missiles and those could do a lot of damage in return... not to mention all the US boats.
06 May 2017
Doctor Who: Knock Knock
Now that was a nice 'base under siege', or rather 'house under siege' episode with a lot of creepiness throughout and an excellent villain in the form of David Suchet. Bill was again superb.
Not overly sure about the resolution, but you can't have everything.
9/10
03 May 2017
Mystery Science Theater 3000: Starcrash
Who wrote this dog's breakfast of a movie? It's like someone decided to let a 7 year old plot a science fiction movie... no a 7 year old could do a better job. Plot elements turn up with no notice whatsoever, the acting is atrocious, the effects are ridiculously cheap. There are better movies with Caroline Munro wearing a bikini for no good reason, that's for sure; namely The Spy Who Loved Me, which was not actually scored by John Barry (Marvin Hamlisch did that one), whose music is pretty much the only good thing about this. Also, who calls a character Stella Star? It's almost as bad as Luke Skywalker...
Bad movies often make for the best riffing and this is no exception. Servo and Crow – it's very odd seeing the latter standing up on his own legs in the theatre – throw some real zingers, as of course does Joel. I laughed a lot at this, although they did miss a couple of obvious riffs... and I have to say that the riffs do sag a bit in the middle of the film.
Also, "Live from New York, it's the torpedo sketch!" is a superb line.
9/10
29 April 2017
Doctor Who: Thin Ice
27 April 2017
Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Beast of Hollow Mountain
24 April 2017
Mystery Science Theater 3000: Avalanche
The film itself is pretty terrible - Rock Hudson and Mia Farrow have no chemistry, the film takes far too long to get to the actual avalanche and much of it is just over the top.
The riffing however is top notch. I actually got hiccups at the end, where the bots and Jonah start giving the destroyed resort TripAdvisor reviews... Also, the skits were great.
10/10
22 April 2017
Doctor Who: Smile
Not exactly the most original story in the show's history - the overall plot is one that has been told before, including one more than one occasion by this show itself.
That said, it's a highly enjoyable episode, helped particularly by Pearl Mackie who manages to steal scenes from Peter Capaldi on a regular basis – she says the really obvious things that a regular person would say... rather than a science fiction writer would have them say. Bill is taken us on an excellent adventure, If you know what I mean...
I'll get me coat...
8/10
19 April 2017
Mystery Science Theater 3000 11.3: "The Time Travellers"
The 200th episode of the show is an excellent one. The movie itself is suitably of its time (no people of colour at all!) to be a rich target for jokes and they're very good jokes indeed.
The skits in the breaks were just as good – in particular the bit involving Rocket Number Nine's welcome return...
Near perfect.
10/10
Mystery Science Theater 3000 11.2: Cry Wilderness
18 April 2017
General Election called for Thursday 8 June
Well, that was a surprise. Although it is clear from the polls why Theresa May has decided to call one.
I'm probably going to end up voting for the Lib Dems – I live in a safe Tory seat anyway. I can't vote for Labour, not now. I hope that the likely mullering it faces saves the party in the long term as they'll have tried the same thing three times (running on a hard-left platform) and failed every time.
But Hope is a place in Arkansas...
Anyway, it's on like Donkey Kong. Prepare yourself for seven weeks of British election campaigning...
15 April 2017
Doctor Who: The Pilot
I am going to be doing mini-reviews of the current run of this show – as well as the new Star Trek series and Mystery Science Theater 3000 from the second episode on. I will try to do them shortly after I've watched them so impressions are fresh in my minds and I'm not too swayed by others.
Took a little while to get going this – 50 minutes was arguably too long for the episode. However, once it did get going, it was very good. Bill is a different sort of companion in that she asks the obvious questions that others haven't always asked in the past. Also, they're very upfront about her being a lesbian, aren't they?
A lot of good humour and the Doctor-Bill-Nardole team works well. Also, the trailers for next week and onwards look very interesting.
7/10
11 April 2017
God's love for us
08 April 2017
Syria missile strikes
29 March 2017
Triggering Article 50
Now I respect the will of the people, but I still think it's a mistake to do this. This is ultimately the result of immigration and pulling up the drawbridge does not deal with the fundamental issues of global inequality. We sit here all snug, pretty and fat in our Western world, while hundreds of millions still struggle to get by.
The sun once never set on the British Empire. Personally, I believe the sun is beginning to set on Britain and the West. We are in decline as other powers rise up... the wheel of power is turning...
22 March 2017
Westminster terrorist attack
My thoughts and prayers are with all those caught up in this horrific situation.
10 March 2017
Old Street station
The station is very much a throwback to the 1990s; with Network SouthEast tiling still very much in place.
So, here you go:
01 February 2017
Delay in next Berlin post
I will get them done, but it may take a while.
30 January 2017
Donald Trump and extreme vetting
28 January 2017
Sir John Hurt 1940-2017
17 January 2017
Planet of the Really Bad Subtext (Review: 'Star Trek' 2.9, "Metamorphosis")
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| She's just watched "The Alternative Factor" |
This is the worst episode I've watched to date.
16 January 2017
Dealing with Trump
05 January 2017
Postcards from the Pleaides (Elite Dangerous Diaries 2)
Doing the 'Maia' run in a Viper Mark IV (I was one of the people who won one in the community goal thing in March last year) is hard, but doable. You have to jump through a lot of unpopulated systems and engage in fuel scooping; trying to get enough fuel without overheating; a task made more complex when you run the risk of an emergency drop out of Frame Shift if you get too close.
Towards the end of the run out, I was actually starting to have Drive malfunctions, but I managed to make it.
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| Landed on an alien world, with a beautiful nebula behind me |
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| Admiring a coronal ejection after a Frame Shift Drive drop-out |
missile launcher.
Before heading back, I chose to take a quick tour of the Pleiades, visiting all the Seven Sisters and their 'parents' Atlas and Pleione. This included a trip to the Maia black hole and a landing on Merope 5C, where the first 'barnacles' were spotted.
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| Approaching the Maia black hole |
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| The Maia black hole itself |
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| The Merope 5 gas giant with its huge rings |
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| Merope 5C, the Planet of the Barnacles. No Barnacles this time though; many have mined out |
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| An ice valley on another remote world that I stopped off at |
My journey back to the Bubble will be via the stations dotted off the 'main route' from Sol; these allow for full refuels and repairs.
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| Approaching PRE Logistics Support Epsilion; you can see my fuel is rather low |
01 January 2017
2017 plans
Otherwise, going to be keeping things fairly 'light and easy', with lots of shorter posts, including some mini reviews.
27 December 2016
Carrie Fisher 1956-2016
Carrie Fisher's role as Princess Leia in the Star Wars series made her a science fiction icon, although this was by no means her only role in her career; she did a particularly good turn in the original Blues Brothers.
Dying after a heart attack shortly after filming her role in the eighth 'main sequence' Star Wars film is no way to go; it will make watching Episode VIII a much more sombre experience.
Rest in Peace.
26 December 2016
Elite: Dangerous adventures update
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| My Viper Mark IV landed at a station |
I have been playing quite a bit of Elite: Dangerous at present and have been making some progress, reaching the trade rank of Peddler and the exploration rank of Mostly Aimless, while being only one or two kills away from going up to Mostly Harmless.
This isn't exactly world beating, but I'm happy with it. My current plan is to fly out to the Pleiades nebula, the nearest stellar landmark of note outside the 'human bubble', the area of habited human space - it was also where the 'barnacles' were found. This is a habited system at Maia, 384 light years from Sol (which I can't currently visit as I need a better Federation rank) and that will be my goal to reach. Using my Basic Discovery scanner, I should be able to make a little bit of money on the run there and back.
While I know taking a Viper Mark IV out there isn't the wisest thing in the world - you only live once. Well, there's no perma-death in this game in anyway.
Second part of my Berlin post is coming soon, but I'll keep you up to date with this as well.
24 December 2016
Wishing all my readers a Merry Christmas
Follow the example of our Saviour Jesus Christ and show love for your fellow human being. Just be nice rather than mean to each other and they will likely reciprocate.
I wish you a Happy Christmas and a healthy New Year.
19 December 2016
Berlin
My thoughts and prayers are with the people of Berlin at this time.
18 December 2016
Berlin Express(es): Innotrans 2016 - the journey
(All photos not credited are my own - these were done with a conventional digital camera without flash - for driver safety reasons - so there may be some quality issues)
From here at the Haven station, I would have boarded the Ost-West Express, the sleeper train that had a portion going from the Dutch port to at least Warsaw and four times a week all the way to Moscow, capital of the then Soviet Union.
As this was a sleeper train, I'd hope that the conductor would have dealt with all the formalities as I passed through into West Germany then into East Germany and back into West Berlin, whose relationship with the rest of the Bundesrepublik was a tad complicated to put it mildly. Otherwise, being woken up by the Grenztruppen at around 3am in the morning would not have been ideal, if I didn't get woken up by the low quality line that was in use in the transit lines between West Germany and West Berlin at the time. There would have been at least two locomotive changes, probably three.
According to the timetable, I'd have left London at 10.20am and arrived, hopefully refreshed, at Berlin Zoo station at 07.02am local time the following morning. A journey time of 19 hours and 42 minutes.
An awful lot has changed since then and will continue to do so; Hook of Holland's heavy rail link will be replaced by a light rail one in 2017.
Out of preference, when heading to a 'northern destination' in London, I will go into London Liverpool Street and where possible I will get a Abellio Greater Anglia service as this is faster by about ten minutes than the TfL Rail service, which calls at most if not all the intermediate stations.
AGA's semi-fast services are operated at present using the Class 321 and Class 360 Desiro electric multiple units. The 08:58 is the first of these to call at Romford after the height of the rush hour and so was pretty busy, but I was able to find a seat in the 321 (sitting in the end bay with space for my suitcase beside me), known to enthusiasts as a 'Dusty Bin' in reference to the character and booby prize in the 1980s game show 3-2-1. I personally find them a tad bland myself.
The journey into Liverpool Street was slightly delayed due to a signal failure. Much of the final approach into the station is through a fairly 'tight' brick cutting and the Great Eastern platforms i.e. 11-18 are pretty gloomy since being built over during the course of the station's refurbishment in the late 1980s-early 1990s. I like the rest of the station, but I am really not a fan of that bit.
From there, it was a walk down to the westbound 'Inner Circle' platforms; as there is no lift to the platform themselves, this does present some difficulty with a suitcase.
Getting to King's Cross St Pancras, the huge interchange station for both mainline stations, it is simply a case of get whatever comes first. This happened to be a Metropolitan Line train. Since the withdrawal of the C stock, everything on this part of the sub-surface lines is handled by the S stock trains;
| By Hahifuheho (Own work) [CC0], via Wikimedia Commons |
Not many photos here sadly, I didn't have time to take anything of the Eurostar itself.
As I had a Sparpreis Europa ticket booked through Loco2.com and printed out at home, I just showed this at one of the check-in desks and went through. There is an airport style security check, followed by two sets of passport gates - one for leaving the UK and one for France. These are easily traversed and it is just a case of waiting in the lounge area until your train is called.
There is a Caffè Nero and a WH Smith in the departures area; I had a croissant - I was going through France after all - which was decent enough, but I've had better over the years. The seats are brown leather and pretty comfortable. Travellers should note that the shops do not accept the Euro, but a cash machine is present if you need Sterling.
Getting up to the platform is via an inclined travelator (a moving walkway for my American readers), then it is simply a case of getting onto your assigned carriage and finding your seat.
Eurostar currently operates three types of trains; the original Class 373s that the service opened with, a refurbished version of the type known as the e300 (in reference to its top speed of 300 km/h) and the new e320, a version of the Siemens Velaro, of which more later. The current plan is to have 17 of the last type, eight of the second and scrap the rest; they're very worn out from over 20 years of daily high-intensity use and heavy exposure to the salty air found inside the Tunnel.
I travelled in an original 373 and the age is starting to show in these; the blinds also needed a bit of dust. I was booked in Standard Premier i.e. first class for leisure travellers and had an airline style seat on my own. These can be tilted back without causing any inconvenience for the passenger behind you; they are also quite soft - more modern stock is a bit hard for my liking.
The drinks trolley came down just before we departed - 10 seconds ahead of our scheduled departure at 1058 BST and my complimentary light meal arrived five minutes later, before we'd even sped through Stratford International, that misleadingly named station next to Westfield shopping centre - it has never had an international train call there.
Since 2007, there has been a direct high speed line running all the way from St Pancras to the Channel Tunnel itself. This runs for 12 miles from St Pancras to south Dagenham, where the line emerges and runs alongside the southern part of the c2c network until splitting off at the QE2 Bridge and diving into another tunnel that runs under the Thames until the approach to Ebbsfleet. This is the fastest stretch of railway in the whole of the UK and is pretty exhilarating to go on; I have used it on a number of occasions in Southeastern's Class 395 Javelins, but this was my first time on a Eurostar.
At Ebbsfleet we stopped to pick up passengers - the service cannot be used for internal travel in the UK - before going onto the second part of the line via Ashford to the Channel Tunnel. The Javelins are only capable of 140, but the 373s, being narrower TGVs (to allow them to operate on the more restricted British loading gauge) top out at 186mph; the official UK record is 203.
I was using my phone speedometer; not the most accurate thing in the world and I plan to get something better for Christmas, but we peaked at 181... mind you, when you're going that fast, getting a fix on your location is not easy. At past 170, the train did rattle a bit, but nothing overly bad.
Going back to the light meal, it was tasty, although the cutlery was cold to the touch.
After passing Ashford and a Southeastern depot, we slowed for the Channel Tunnel itself, where the line speed is only 99 miles per hour. The journey under the English Channel or La Manche takes around 25 minutes and you can get mobile signal during it. I could also listen to my podcast without problems; something I can't do on the Jubilee Line!
Exiting the tunnel at 1258 CEST - the clocks of course go forward an hour once you enter France, we swiftly passed Calais-Fréthun. Some Eurostar trains call here and you can get connections for TGV or local services to other parts of France; you will need to change if you are planning a day trip as this station is well out of town. It should be safer now 'the Jungle' has been cleared.
Our train was not stopping here - it was heading onto Lille Europe. The French actually run their trains on the left like us; a bit of a surprise, but that's the way the first ones were built using British expertise and it has stuck. The exception is in Alsace and Lorraine, which were ruled by Germany from 1871 to 1919 after the Franco-Prussian War and switched over to right-hand running.
As we sped through the countryside of Pas-de-Calais, I looked at the lovely landscape and noted to myself that this was where two world wars were fought... Indeed, I can recall a school trip to the Western Front battlefields where we used Eurotunnel and the first thing I saw as we came out of the Tunnel were poppies growing by the track.
The only stop for this train in France is at Lille Europe, our approach to the station being announced in English, French and German. Arriving at 1323, my carriage was at the wrong end of the train (it stopped under one of the bridges) to get a full appreciation of what seems to be a fairly nice station built to serve TGV/Eurostar services.
While waiting for our departure, I heard a group of men laughing loudly in the bar car - this was too crowded for me to go in - and also saw a man wearing a kilt. These may or may not have been related.
Leaving the station, I saw a group of TGVs in the sidings outside the station. I believe these were the first 300 km/h trains in the world when the second version, the TGV Atlantique entered service in 1988. I would really like to ride on one at some point - especially the double decker versions now in use.
Anyway, back to my own journey. I crossed into Belgium without even noticing it until I checked my location on my phone and also noted that dedicated high speed lines can be a bit of a boring experience as you barely see any other trains or indeed much in the way of rail infrastructure.
The Eurostar service terminates here for the time being, although there are current plans to run some trains to Amsterdam from December 2017.
| SNCB EMUs at the approach to Brussels station |
There is a short connecting subway from the Eurostar platforms to the other platforms, but this is currently closed for security reasons - Brussels was of course subjected to a major terror attack in March 2016.
As a result, you have to take a longer walk into the main station, then back to your platforms. This is doable in the time allowed for the interchange, but if you're held up more than about 10 minutes, you may end up missing your connection, although you will be allowed to travel on the next train.
I managed to make the journey in time though, even with my coach being right at the far (eastern end) of the nine-coach train, whose ultimate destination is Frankfurt-am-Main i.e. the big city in southern Germany.
The Deutsche Bahn Class 406 train, known as the ICE-3M, is one of the Siemens Velaro family of high-speed Electrical Multiple Units, which operate in various forms in a number of countries including Russia (as the Sapsan), China and Spain. ICE stands for Intercity-Express (the then Deutsche Bundesbahn licensed the name 'Inter-City' from BR back in 1971 and others have used it as well) and the M stands for Multisystem. These trains are multi-voltage and cleared for operation in Germany, France, Belgium and the Netherlands; another version of the Velaro is the one that Deutsche Bahn proposed to run through the Channel Tunnel to London, but that proposal was put on hold in 2014. I personally severely doubt it will happen at all after Brexit.
Anyway, the Velaro is also the same type of train being used for the e320 and is capable of a top speed of 200 mph. Having ridden inside the German version, I have to say that I have a new favourite electric train.
| Not quite the man in Seat 61, but close enough... |
It's very roomy; especially in First Class. The seats are lovely, even the airline style ones - they have foot rests as well. You also get a free newspaper (which I declined as it was too big) and free Wi-Fi, the latter only once you are actually in Germany. The carriage was a tad warm, but that might have been me being a bit under the weather.
The ICE3M also contains a 'Bordbistro' that sells drinks and light meals, although like most train food they aren't exactly cheap. I bought a bottle of water and realised that I needed from then on to ask for water 'ohne Gas' or I was likely to get the fizzy variety...
In the vestibules there is a display screen that can tell you the train's current speed in kilometres per hour and at the ends of the train, there is a section where First Class passengers can see out through the cab ahead of them, although the window can be made opaque by the driver if he/she wants. I wasn't in that section myself and at any rate, I was also facing the wrong direction i.e. backwards.
So onto the journey; this one was a lot more fun than the first leg of the trip as there was a lot more to see. The eastern approach to Brussels Central makes that to London Waterloo look tidy; there are an awful lot of tracks there. I also saw a large number of Desiro EMUs; this Siemens built family of multiple units are very common around Europe these days, including in the UK.
The train stops at Brussels Nord and Liège-Guillemins before crossing the border and moving over to right hand side running. The train runs very fast at times - the indicator saying 230km/h at one point, which is faster than any domestic UK train of course. During this and the next journey, I went past an awful lot of freight yards and saw a great many locomotives used for this - hauling goods by rail is increasingly popular, especially for cars, as you can't exactly stick them in large numbers in an aircraft.
At around 1556, after crossing into Germany, the driver suddenly braked - we were still 24 minutes out from Cologne at this point and things started to slide off the table. There was also some rather uncomfortable sideward motion.
Journalists like to comment about the comparative prices of our rail services to those in Europe, but Deutsche Bahn have had increasing problems with their own trains running on time. They are also reliant heavily on government subsidy and even then are eliminating their sleeper services - more on that in the third part.
We eventually arrived in Cologne five minutes late at 1620, which wouldn't be deemed late under the standard British way of reckoning (which is a minimum of ten minutes for long-distance services) but could make a connection trickier.
I will point out that shortly before arriving, the staff brought round free mini packs of Gummi Bears. These have a certain childhood resonance for me; my German teacher (who I still see from time to time) would give them out as rewards.
All in all, an enjoyable trip on an excellent train.
9/10
Cologne's central station, located right next to the city's famous cathedral (which survived the Allied bombing of the city during the Second World War because it was used for navigational purposes by bomber crews) is rather typical of German urban stations in that it possesses large arched roofs for the train shed, is rather larger than it needs to be and is very open to a decent gust of wind.
I had a while to wait for my connection (or as they are called in German, 'Anschluss', something that of course immediately put me in mind of Mr. One Testicle) so I was able to take pictures of some interesting rolling stock and features of German stations I would become familiar with during the course of my stay.
Firstly, this, the Wagenreihungsplan or 'coach sequence indicator'.
There are three common posters that can be found at German stations; the first two are common throughout mainland Europe in fact.
- A yellow poster telling you all the departing trains for the day, with their booked platform, their destination and their calling points, although sometimes only the major ones.
- A white poster that does the same for arriving trains.
- The 'coach sequence indicator' that tells you where you are on the platform and where the long-distance services will stop so you can make sure you are standing in the right place to board your booked carriage.
Also, loco-hauled double-decker trains.
Locomotive haulage is still far more common in Germany and France than it is in Britain; while the easier to operate multiple unit is becoming more popular, you will still see big bulky electric locomotives hauling relatively modern carriages. I would also discover that these electric locomotives are rather loud...
Also, because European railway lines are/were built to a larger profile, many services, including some of the TGVs, are double decker trains.
So, onto my train.
This was a DB Class 402, aka the ICE2. This is a eight-car unit with a power car at one end, six trailers following it and a driving trailer at the other end. They also have names - this one, 402 205, was called Oldenburg after the city in Lower Saxony.
ICE trains have compartments in some coaches; in the ICE2 there are both full compartments and 'semi-compartments' in which your table is separated from the others by a translucent screen. I got the latter, which I had to share with two other people.
We left Cologne to the second at 1648 and crossed the Rhine a minute later; very nice river that.
This service had a 'Bordrestaurant' and as a 1st Class passenger, I was able to order meals from my table. The menu is a colour booklet with those artfully styled photographs of the meals - they never look as good as that on the plate of course. I was served by a slightly camp male German waiter, who actually said "See you later alligator" to me at one point.
As we approached Wuppertal, a city I know best for its monorail (it connects with the station there, but I didn't see it). I decided to order German-style sausages and potato salad. Unfortunately, they'd not got any potato salad, so I had black bread instead; it was a unusual but pleasant meal. I also had dessert, which was some type of German cake.
As my main course arrived, we stopped at Hagen, where a batch of Borussia Dortmund fans had just got off; they were making their way to a home game against SC Freiburg, which they would win 3-1.
As we passed another station, I noticed that the sign there was rather similar in its font to the Rail Alphabet font as used by British Rail. I later found out that the rather similar Helvetica font has been extensively used in transport settings, including formerly by Deutsche Bahn.
We spent over ten minutes at Hamm, which also had something called a 'Bahnhofsmission', which is a Christian organisation based at major railway stations in Germany and I don't really know much more than that. No explanation was given for the delay, so I asked the "alligator" staff member why we were being held up. He told me that we were waiting for another unit to couple onto the rear of the train. I wish that had been explained earlier...
After a stop at Bielefeld (most famous for a long running German internet joke conspiracy that it doesn't exist), where we departed four minutes behind schedule, we soon entered into the first of two extended non-stop runs.
The first of these was a 47 minute run across western Germany to Hanover, which the Germans spell with two 'n's. During this and before hand I noticed the rather large distance boards at the side of the track, which are considerably easier to see than the ones in the UK even at high speed. A quick timing with some of them confirmed that we were running at around 125 miles per hour. The train was also shaking quite a bit.
After Hanover (another big station - it is a major railway junction), it was a run of over an hour to Berlin-Spandau. In the Cold War days, the route to Berlin was via Stendal, but high speed services now go via Oebisfelde (non-stop), which was a border crossing for local trains only.
However, by this point, it was getting rather dark and I couldn't really see much outside the train. The first time I crossed the old Iron Curtain, it was on a coach past a disused border post... here you couldn't see anything apart from flashing past Oebisfelde at high speed. It got a bit boring.
I didn't log my actual arrival time at Berlin-Spandau, but I believe I was broadly on time.
8/10
S-Bahn to my hotel
I had in fact chosen to go to Berlin-Spandau rather than the Hauptbahnhof as my hotel was roughly halfway between them and it was a shorter overall journey by about 15 minutes.
To be honest, I remember fairly little about this part of the journey; it had gone 9pm at this point, I was getting fairly tired and just wanted to get to my destination, something which involved a long walk down a major boulevard, noticing the election posters from the city elections earlier in the week were still up. I took some photos which I will share later.
Anyway, my thoughts on the Berlin S-Bahn will follow in Part Three... Part Two will be Innotrans itself.
10 December 2016
Less Westworld, More Pestworld (Review, 'Star Trek', 2.8, "I, Mudd")
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| The disco at the Orphan Black convention wasn't as busy as hoped |
****
A new crew member turns out to be an android and takes control of the Enterprise, sending it to an uncharted planet. The planet is filled with androids and under the rule of an old acquaintance of the crew... who would rather like to have the Federation starship for his own.
****
Harry Mudd is back. Yes, the campest conman in the Alpha Quadrant, a man who a Ferengi would find over the top, has ended up in control of an entire planet populated with over two hundred thousand human facsimiles. Dressed in a very loud uniform more associated with petty tyrants who think they have a grand army when in reality it would crumble at the first sign of a US Marine Expeditionary Force.
(Speaking of the US military, Sulu's time in this episode is limited and he won't be back for a while as George Takei was on the other side of the US filming John Wayne's The Green Berets in which he played a South Vietnamese officer, one of the very few examples of a Vietnam war film that was in favour of the US involvement there)
Mudd, to absolutely no-one's surprise, has used his desire to create a very large number of attractive female robots; many of them identical and capable of functioning as 'human females do'. That's right, he's built an army of sex robots. Unfortunately/fortunately, none of them have full self-awareness and certainly nothing like the range of emotions as portrayed in the Westworld series. Mudd in himself is greatly irritating and the episode is better when he is not
The androids were played by pairs of twins and the use of split screen to get as many of them as possible on screen at once. Of particular note is the Alice series (played by Alyce and Rhae Andrece) who resembles Zooey Deschanel, although that lady had of course not even been born yet. Well, if that's you like..
The 'robots' are pretty robotic and intentionally so; they in fact have their own agenda, predating Skynet by over a decade.
In order to defeat them, the regulars (Chekov and Spock stand out here) decide to engage in one of the strangest ways to drive a bunch of androids insane I have ever seen. It involves imaginary explosive, the crew making phaser noises and crazy dancing. It makes a recent episode of The Librarians, in which a bad guy is defeated by a group rendition of "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" look sane.
Mudd gets his comeuppance and suffers a fate that you wouldn't wish on your own worst enemy... let's just say that I am sure some people would sympathise with him.
****
Conclusion
Despite having one of the most irritating characters in the whole of Trek by a country mile, this actually ends up being a very good episode. Completely crazy at times mind you, but nonetheless, very good.
8/10
















